Wednesday, August 06, 2014

Still Feeling the Effects of My Total Meltdown

I don't know why certain things affect me so much and pretty much cause me to have a meltdown/panic attack that last for hours. Some bad situations just rock me to the core. I've always known I'm a really sensitive person and being pregnant and all hormonal probably didn't help but some of the things people do just really get to me.

One minute I'm super excited listening to tunes while waiting for my hubby to get home from work so we can go do some grocery shopping in our new car that we just put on the road today. This meant I'd get to practice my driving for my full licence that I plan on going for at the end of the month. AND THEN I get a text from my boss saying I've gotten complaints from customers and workers that your not working as good as you use to so take this week to relax and you will have back your normal hours next week.

LIKE SERIOUSLY WTF!! Of course I'm not as good as I use to be I'm 6 month pregnant, hello!! I was their best employee for god knows how long and they only one they trusted to open the store on weekends and this is how they treat me. I have 3 weeks left with them until I leave due to my pregnancy and I told them, many times now, that I needed as many hours as possible before I leave. Raising a baby isn't cheap!

Extremely hurt, I proceeded to ask her what I had done wrong so I could fix it and she didn't want to tell me until I came in to pick up my check on Friday. AGAIN WTF! So you tell me something like that and then decide to not tell me what really wrong, so I can then worry about it for days and have my mind think of all the worst possible scenarios. NOT FUCKING COOL! Pardon my language. But she does know I'm pregnant right, its kind of obvious at this point. I've been there longer then everyone beside the manager and one day staff. Why would she stress me out and do this to me when I only have 3 weeks left there.

I know for a fact that I'm a better worker then half the people there. I've been doing this job for over 4 years and I take pride in my work. I've been told by my bosses numerous times how much of a good job I'm doing but now that I'm pregnant they cant be a little understanding. My boss even told me 2 weeks ago I couldn't take the weekend off for my baby shower because she was getting married. That she needed me and that she only trusted me to open the store. So I had to cancel the day that worked best for me and everyone else for my baby shower because of her and now she does this.

How is all of this fair in anyway. I just don't get it. I cried over this pretty much all day.i even had a panic attack on the bathroom floor, home by myself worrying my ass off about money. I was angry, bitter and sad. I came so very close to texting her back and just saying you know what I quit. If you don't appreciate me and your going to pull this shit. I QUIT! But after thinking about it a lot I didn't because I really need the money. I was hoping Id be making money off my blog by now, but the ads aren't really selling much, and I guess I'm fine with that because that's not why I blog. Its just an added bonus. Anyways I decided to see what she had to say on Friday and if it still bothered me this much I was going to give her a piece of my mind and tell her I quit.

What do you guys think?

Sincerely Charmed

PS: I think this is the perfect opportunity to try and sell some of the healing trees I hand make with crystals that have natural healing properties on ebay again. Hopefully this time I actually sell some :)

PSS: I recently came across 2 blogs that have quickly become my Top Favorite Blogs. Great Post about Addiction, Recovery and everything in between by Amazing Supportive Individuals. If you like this blog then please go check them out, I guarantee you wont regret it.
The Secret Slayer
The Methadone Maze